sophisticated sissy
12-04-2008, 11:57 AM
Thought you might get a chuckle out of this. It's from the SF Gate:
Give me AC/DC, Tom Waits. They didn't sell out
Peter Hartlaub, Chronicle Pop Culture Critic
Monday, December 1, 2008
The band AC/DC isn't particularly difficult for critics to deconstruct. Members have been writing the same song over and over again for more than 30 years. They're a little bit old for their five-double-entendres-per-song average, and the rhythm section may be physically incapable of keeping anything except 4/4 time.
But at least they didn't sell out.
AC/DC, which plays two shows in Oakland this week, has never released a love ballad. The members didn't change the band's sound when their careers faltered. The closest thing they have to a greatest hits album is a live record from 1992. And if they ever did put out a Christmas album, Angus and the boys would almost certainly rhyme the words "baby Jesus" with "now pour me some Chivas."
I wake up each morning hoping that another one of my favorite bands or artists will not sell out. I root for them with the same fervor that you might bring to a Golden State Warriors playoff game or a "Dancing With the Stars" finale. AC/DC and Ozzy Osbourne have had a similar amount of career highs and lows. Not selling out is the sole reason AC/DC is still an all-time favorite, and Osbourne is all but musically dead to me.
When Steve Earle went on "Today" and had the guts to sing the controversial "John Walker's Blues" during the peak of pro-war sentiment - with Matt Lauer looking at him like he was a traitor - I felt proud to own all of his albums.
And when his song "The Revolution Starts ..." showed up on a General Motors truck commercial, I kept jabbing myself with the remote control while hoping it was all a bad dream. Public Enemy's Flavor Flav getting his own reality show was a very bad day. Finding out that NOFX kept a keg of Pabst Blue Ribbon in the alley behind Slim's during their show was a good one.
Selling out can be defined as any action that puts money and celebrity as a priority over art and paying respect to one's loyal following. There are shades of gray, and mitigating circumstances. I think, for instance, we can all agree on the Willie Nelson Rule: Any artist who once owed more than $10 million in back taxes and helped start Farm Aid can be forgiven for a Taco Bell commercial and a couple of Christmas albums.
While I worked as a courtroom reporter in Los Angeles for four years, covering mostly entertainment-related litigation, almost every music-related lawsuit seemed to be a product of selling out, and every trip to the witness stand a chance to sound like a money-grubbing baby. The all-time low point involved Mötley Crüe, which ended one contentious legal battle between band members by getting the band back together.
The shining beacon of light in this wasteland was Tom Waits. I covered three of his lawsuits, and each one involved fighting against his music or a sound-alike being used in commercials. In one of these cases, he got on the witness stand and recalled embarrassing events from his addictive younger years - in a trial where he would have made a huge royalty if he lost the case. "It's like being a little bit pregnant," he said, when asked why he couldn't stand the thought of even one of his songs being used in an advertisement.
After that, I pledged to buy all of his albums, even if they contained nothing but French horns and strange men with German accents shouting into megaphones. ("The Black Rider" came pretty close.)
Accompanying this article is a quiz to determine if your favorite band or artist is a sellout. Most modern acts aren't going to fare well. And when a band or artist rises above commercialism, ego and greed, it's time to rejoice.
__________________________________________________ ______________
Is your favorite band a sellout?
Take this quiz to find out. You may need to make a few Internet searches. Allmusic.com is a good place to start, especially for question No. 9.
1. Has your favorite band or artist completed a "farewell tour" (or album), and then returned?
Yes (40 points per comeback)
No (0 points)
2. How many lead singers have been featured during the career of your favorite band?
One (0 points)
Two (15 points)
Three or more (30 points)
3. Have your favorite rockers (or their music) ever appeared in ...
The soundtrack to "Friends" or "Melrose Place"? (10 points per song)
A TV commercial? (30 points)
An animated movie? (60 points)
"The Star Wars Holiday Special"? (200 points)
4. Have they ever recorded a duet with ...
Sheryl Crow? (20 points)
Michael Jackson? (35 points)
A vocal track featuring a deceased artist? (55 points)
Kid Rock? (100 points)
5. If your favorite artists are not part of a hip-hop act, have they ever attempted to rap?
Yes (50 points)
No (0 points)
6. If they are a hip-hop act, have they ever attempted to sing?
Yes (25 points)
No (0 points)
7. Looking at your favorite act's discography, what percentage of total album releases have been greatest hits records, collections of B sides or other compilations?
Less than 10 percent (0 points)
Between 10 and 25 percent (15 points)
Between 25 and 50 percent (30 points)
More than 50 percent (50 points)
8. Has your favorite band or artist ever put out ...
An MTV Unplugged or VH1 Storytellers album? (15 points)
An album made up entirely of covers? (25 points)
A Christmas album? (40 points)
9. Is your favorite artist Sting or Eric Clapton?
Yes (100 points)
No (0 points)
10. Has your favorite artist or band (or any member) appeared in a reality show?
Yes (40 points)
No (0 points)
Your band's sellout total:
0 to 50 - Not a sellout.
50-100 - Has some sellout qualities, but doesn't qualify as a full-on sellout. Be ready to drop out of the act's fan club if songs start to appear in movies starring Katherine Heigl.
100-250 - Definitely a sellout. These are the kinds of acts that throw one or two bad new tracks on a greatest hits album just so the hard-core fans will buy in. Best to cut ties immediately.
250 or more - Your favorite act would probably rather run you over in a crosswalk than be 30 seconds late to the recording for its latest McDonald's commercial. Find a nice Mission District alternative rock band that's never going to make it and follow it around instead.
- Peter Hartlaub
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/12/01/DDV914CU0L.DTL
This article appeared on page E - 1 of the San Francisco Chronicle
© 2008 Hearst Communications Inc.
Give me AC/DC, Tom Waits. They didn't sell out
Peter Hartlaub, Chronicle Pop Culture Critic
Monday, December 1, 2008
The band AC/DC isn't particularly difficult for critics to deconstruct. Members have been writing the same song over and over again for more than 30 years. They're a little bit old for their five-double-entendres-per-song average, and the rhythm section may be physically incapable of keeping anything except 4/4 time.
But at least they didn't sell out.
AC/DC, which plays two shows in Oakland this week, has never released a love ballad. The members didn't change the band's sound when their careers faltered. The closest thing they have to a greatest hits album is a live record from 1992. And if they ever did put out a Christmas album, Angus and the boys would almost certainly rhyme the words "baby Jesus" with "now pour me some Chivas."
I wake up each morning hoping that another one of my favorite bands or artists will not sell out. I root for them with the same fervor that you might bring to a Golden State Warriors playoff game or a "Dancing With the Stars" finale. AC/DC and Ozzy Osbourne have had a similar amount of career highs and lows. Not selling out is the sole reason AC/DC is still an all-time favorite, and Osbourne is all but musically dead to me.
When Steve Earle went on "Today" and had the guts to sing the controversial "John Walker's Blues" during the peak of pro-war sentiment - with Matt Lauer looking at him like he was a traitor - I felt proud to own all of his albums.
And when his song "The Revolution Starts ..." showed up on a General Motors truck commercial, I kept jabbing myself with the remote control while hoping it was all a bad dream. Public Enemy's Flavor Flav getting his own reality show was a very bad day. Finding out that NOFX kept a keg of Pabst Blue Ribbon in the alley behind Slim's during their show was a good one.
Selling out can be defined as any action that puts money and celebrity as a priority over art and paying respect to one's loyal following. There are shades of gray, and mitigating circumstances. I think, for instance, we can all agree on the Willie Nelson Rule: Any artist who once owed more than $10 million in back taxes and helped start Farm Aid can be forgiven for a Taco Bell commercial and a couple of Christmas albums.
While I worked as a courtroom reporter in Los Angeles for four years, covering mostly entertainment-related litigation, almost every music-related lawsuit seemed to be a product of selling out, and every trip to the witness stand a chance to sound like a money-grubbing baby. The all-time low point involved Mötley Crüe, which ended one contentious legal battle between band members by getting the band back together.
The shining beacon of light in this wasteland was Tom Waits. I covered three of his lawsuits, and each one involved fighting against his music or a sound-alike being used in commercials. In one of these cases, he got on the witness stand and recalled embarrassing events from his addictive younger years - in a trial where he would have made a huge royalty if he lost the case. "It's like being a little bit pregnant," he said, when asked why he couldn't stand the thought of even one of his songs being used in an advertisement.
After that, I pledged to buy all of his albums, even if they contained nothing but French horns and strange men with German accents shouting into megaphones. ("The Black Rider" came pretty close.)
Accompanying this article is a quiz to determine if your favorite band or artist is a sellout. Most modern acts aren't going to fare well. And when a band or artist rises above commercialism, ego and greed, it's time to rejoice.
__________________________________________________ ______________
Is your favorite band a sellout?
Take this quiz to find out. You may need to make a few Internet searches. Allmusic.com is a good place to start, especially for question No. 9.
1. Has your favorite band or artist completed a "farewell tour" (or album), and then returned?
Yes (40 points per comeback)
No (0 points)
2. How many lead singers have been featured during the career of your favorite band?
One (0 points)
Two (15 points)
Three or more (30 points)
3. Have your favorite rockers (or their music) ever appeared in ...
The soundtrack to "Friends" or "Melrose Place"? (10 points per song)
A TV commercial? (30 points)
An animated movie? (60 points)
"The Star Wars Holiday Special"? (200 points)
4. Have they ever recorded a duet with ...
Sheryl Crow? (20 points)
Michael Jackson? (35 points)
A vocal track featuring a deceased artist? (55 points)
Kid Rock? (100 points)
5. If your favorite artists are not part of a hip-hop act, have they ever attempted to rap?
Yes (50 points)
No (0 points)
6. If they are a hip-hop act, have they ever attempted to sing?
Yes (25 points)
No (0 points)
7. Looking at your favorite act's discography, what percentage of total album releases have been greatest hits records, collections of B sides or other compilations?
Less than 10 percent (0 points)
Between 10 and 25 percent (15 points)
Between 25 and 50 percent (30 points)
More than 50 percent (50 points)
8. Has your favorite band or artist ever put out ...
An MTV Unplugged or VH1 Storytellers album? (15 points)
An album made up entirely of covers? (25 points)
A Christmas album? (40 points)
9. Is your favorite artist Sting or Eric Clapton?
Yes (100 points)
No (0 points)
10. Has your favorite artist or band (or any member) appeared in a reality show?
Yes (40 points)
No (0 points)
Your band's sellout total:
0 to 50 - Not a sellout.
50-100 - Has some sellout qualities, but doesn't qualify as a full-on sellout. Be ready to drop out of the act's fan club if songs start to appear in movies starring Katherine Heigl.
100-250 - Definitely a sellout. These are the kinds of acts that throw one or two bad new tracks on a greatest hits album just so the hard-core fans will buy in. Best to cut ties immediately.
250 or more - Your favorite act would probably rather run you over in a crosswalk than be 30 seconds late to the recording for its latest McDonald's commercial. Find a nice Mission District alternative rock band that's never going to make it and follow it around instead.
- Peter Hartlaub
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/12/01/DDV914CU0L.DTL
This article appeared on page E - 1 of the San Francisco Chronicle
© 2008 Hearst Communications Inc.