Jaypee
09-18-2007, 05:55 PM
This is not music related, but it cracked me up. Someone pointed me to this really funny car ad in Craigslist-Providence, RI. This person definitely sounds like a Threadhead...?? Fess up, guys!
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1990 ford crown victoria lx 1 owner 79K cheap safe relaible 5.0 EFI
Reply to: sale-420846863@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-12, 6:08PM
1990 Ford Crown Vic- elderly person not included
This is basic transportation. Roomy 4 door, built like a tank. Its safe and reliable. Wipers, horn, directionals and all lights work. Its got a fuel injected 5.0L v8 that is in good tune, so it actually gets decent miles per gallon. This Vic is a fantastic 1st car or a perfect car for a family on a budget.
First stuff that doesn't work:
the a/c compressor is frozen, needs a junk yard replacement.
The driver's side mirror IS ON, but is banged up- could be replaced if desired.
Overdrive is shot- car shifts/drives perfectly fine, just the overdrive is gone (happens to all of them after a long while)
* INSPECTED until 2009
*Its solid underneath: no frame rot, has only light surface rust in a few patches on the underside and has some cosmetic/non-structural rust on the passenger (curb) side, very lower quarter edge (pics available of this specific part).
* your landlord will not be P-O'd at you again for bringing home a junker: doesn't leak pools of oil or smoke like James Bond's car trying to evade capture.
* safe: full frame car with disc brakes
* mechanically reliable: proven 5.0L injected motor- these things live forever if they are maintained (such as this car has been). Fresh oil change and tuneup. New exhaust- quiet as a whisper. Odo shows 79K miles
* its ugly as your aunt Mildred: no one will bother carve their name into it in the parking lot and if they do- you won't care. Ditto for supermarket carriage scrapes, eggs at Halloween or ice encrusted snowballs in the winter.
* it smells like an old mans shoe on the inside: this is actually a GOOD thing- because it proves exactly who drove the car for its entire life. Remedy this with air fresheners
* it has a crummy radio and nothing else: your friends/kids will be unable to force you to listen to their horrific music on cd.
TEENAGERS!
Listen up: this is the PERFECT car for you: Its huge and brown and has exactly ZERO sex appeal of any kind- no one will steal it when you leave it parked outside in the city until all hours. It has a huge trunk into which you can stuff all of your belongings when the school/parents finally throw you out. Its only worth $500 bucks, so if past experience serves me right- it is somehow the ideal car for you to install a $2500 stereo into.
Tell your parents to purchase this car for you, or put off buying those school books and ride in style! Old-dude style!
To sum up: safe reliable inspected 4 door transportation. This is the MOST car you're going to get on here for under a grand.
Title in hand!
No BS or time wasters- cash gets you keys.
$500 FIRM - trades (partial and otherwise) considered.
Email for more pics.
*********************************
1990 ford crown victoria lx 1 owner 79K cheap safe relaible 5.0 EFI
Reply to: sale-420846863@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-09-12, 6:08PM
1990 Ford Crown Vic- elderly person not included
This is basic transportation. Roomy 4 door, built like a tank. Its safe and reliable. Wipers, horn, directionals and all lights work. Its got a fuel injected 5.0L v8 that is in good tune, so it actually gets decent miles per gallon. This Vic is a fantastic 1st car or a perfect car for a family on a budget.
First stuff that doesn't work:
the a/c compressor is frozen, needs a junk yard replacement.
The driver's side mirror IS ON, but is banged up- could be replaced if desired.
Overdrive is shot- car shifts/drives perfectly fine, just the overdrive is gone (happens to all of them after a long while)
* INSPECTED until 2009
*Its solid underneath: no frame rot, has only light surface rust in a few patches on the underside and has some cosmetic/non-structural rust on the passenger (curb) side, very lower quarter edge (pics available of this specific part).
* your landlord will not be P-O'd at you again for bringing home a junker: doesn't leak pools of oil or smoke like James Bond's car trying to evade capture.
* safe: full frame car with disc brakes
* mechanically reliable: proven 5.0L injected motor- these things live forever if they are maintained (such as this car has been). Fresh oil change and tuneup. New exhaust- quiet as a whisper. Odo shows 79K miles
* its ugly as your aunt Mildred: no one will bother carve their name into it in the parking lot and if they do- you won't care. Ditto for supermarket carriage scrapes, eggs at Halloween or ice encrusted snowballs in the winter.
* it smells like an old mans shoe on the inside: this is actually a GOOD thing- because it proves exactly who drove the car for its entire life. Remedy this with air fresheners
* it has a crummy radio and nothing else: your friends/kids will be unable to force you to listen to their horrific music on cd.
TEENAGERS!
Listen up: this is the PERFECT car for you: Its huge and brown and has exactly ZERO sex appeal of any kind- no one will steal it when you leave it parked outside in the city until all hours. It has a huge trunk into which you can stuff all of your belongings when the school/parents finally throw you out. Its only worth $500 bucks, so if past experience serves me right- it is somehow the ideal car for you to install a $2500 stereo into.
Tell your parents to purchase this car for you, or put off buying those school books and ride in style! Old-dude style!
To sum up: safe reliable inspected 4 door transportation. This is the MOST car you're going to get on here for under a grand.
Title in hand!
No BS or time wasters- cash gets you keys.
$500 FIRM - trades (partial and otherwise) considered.
Email for more pics.